An invisible Seagal. Now that would be something to "see"!

Orcs and Goblins flying through the air in all directions, without an enemy in sight. They might even have been able to make the whole trilogy the usual length of a Seagal movie; just get seated and you are watching the end!
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Yes! Frodo was such a pussy. Seagal would've dealt with those pesky uruk-hai (sp?) no problems and given those bitches Merry and Pippin a slap too *POW*
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Tolkien definitely wrote about some very annoying characters!
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Thith ith very hard to read biting my tongue. The only annoying characterth in Tolkien wath Boromir and Elrond. The retht were well rounded and prime exthampleth of reluctant heroeth.
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Yes, but why had the main character to be the most annoying?
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You'd be annoying if you had the fate of the world thrust upon you. Especially when every day you are being tempted by an evil ring and are having to fight it with all your willpower 24/7 whilst trying to avoid getting captured by people who ar eout to kill you. Besides the Frodo parts of LOTR is about friendship and how we can get through the most difficult of times with the help of our friends.
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That's bullshit, though. I'd be mackin' hos and bitch-slapping suckers and punks all day and making it look good. Then I'd destroy the ring in the fire and urinate on the lava flow but only after smack talking that gay eye in the tower and making some prank telephone calls to that chump in the wizards tower - and maybe stopping off for fried chicken because everyone knows that KFC is the FOOD OF CHAMPIONS.
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Why fight temptation?
The ring was just a tool after all.
You don't buy a new hammer and then burn it just in case you hit your fingers with it.
Concentrate on the job in hand, have a plan.

Use the ring and kick Sauron and his boys out of his castle .
Have the Black Riders doing pizza delivery.
Have Saruman and Gandalf as childrens entertainers.
Enslave the elves and use them to gamble on instead of horses as they are very good at running away.
Get the dwarves mining for gold, precious stones and making jewelry.
Get the hobbits cooking and brewing ale.
Then it's party time for you and the rest of the human race.

Job done.
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If I was making the LotR films, I would've made it more modern. Instead of the plains of middle earth I'd have it set on a large ocean. And a ring as a wepon of destruction? Try nuclear warheads.

And the rubbish fellowship would instead be replaced by a stripper, a semi-retired engineer, a laundry man and a disgraced special-ops martial arts master turned chef. And the baddies would be man wearing an all black ensemble and chief O'Brien.

And I'd call it Under Siege.

Awesome.
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To show how the weakest and smallest can still achieve as much as any other?
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